About Sara Fredrickson

About a month before my diagnosis I noticed multiple bruises on my legs.  New ones would appear and the old ones would stay.  I tried not to be too concerned with them and continued going to work and running regularly.  With every day, I began feeling more fatigued.  I would walk up stairs at work and feel my heart pounding in my head. I   returned from a run one evening and my heart wouldn't stop racing, my heart rate was at 190 BPM. I began to become very worried and I knew something wasn't right.  One of my wisdom teeth had become impacted as my symptoms worsened, but I wanted to wait to have anything looked at until I was covered with some form of insurance.  Unfortunately, the day came when I couldn’t take it anymore. My body was bruising, the inside of my mouth hurt, and my body was exhausted. Without insurance, I took myself to the dentist to get my tooth removed in hopes that it was the cause of my pain.  The surgeon became worried when he saw the abnormal bruising in my mouth, and on my body. He ordered blood work before any of my teeth would be pulled.

The next day I had a fever of 103, my tooth was in excruciating amounts of pain and my head was pounding.  I went to the clinic to get the results of my blood work.  While waiting I began accepting that things were going to be worse that I had originally expected.  I was called into the patient room just in time for my mom to join me.  She had left work for the day.  Sitting there waiting for the doctor, I couldn’t stop thinking the worst.  There was a knock on the door and the doctor walked in.  He started explaining to me that my platelets were extremely low.  They were in the 20,000 range and normal is above 150,000.  My white blood cell count was also low as well as my hemoglobin.  The doctor explained how it could be just a blood infection or it could be Leukemia.  At that point, I knew I had cancer.  He left us alone for a bit and I broke down.  I couldn’t help but think about how expensive things were going to get without insurance, and then my mind would wander back to how sick I was. 

The doctor admitted me to the hospital where I was to have a bone marrow biopsy which would determine the reason for my illness.  The next day, as I waited for the results of my biopsy, I couldn’t explain the amount of anxiety I had.  Finally, the Oncologist walked in and placed her hand on my leg.  Lying in the hospital bed, I looked up at her as she explained how my blast cells (immature cells in the bone marrow) were somehow getting into my blood before they were mature.  I could tell by the look on her face it wasn’t the answer she was hoping for.  She told me I had a type of Leukemia called Acute Promyelocytic Leukemia (APL). I went numb.  Unfortunately, I feel that I’ve been that way ever since.  I spent 25 days in the hospital and I couldn’t wait to get out.  I had to spend an extra three days than I needed to because of formalities and paperwork which were the three most frustrating days of my life. 

The day came when I was finally going to go home.  My mom and oldest brother were sitting with me in my room eating breakfast.  My mom tried to call my dad to tell him I was coming home that day.  There was no answer.  It was weird, he wasn’t at work.  We sat in silence for a bit trying to finish our meals but my stomach was in my throat.  Something didn’t feel right.  Suddenly the phone rang and my mom answered.  It was my other brother and I can not explain the noises I heard coming from the line.  Goosebumps ran down my body. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. It couldn’t be happening.  The call lasted what seemed like forever.  My dad was dead.  It was unexpected. I miss him so much and now, the four of us have to do this alone. 

Every day is a struggle and I am one that hates to admit when I need help.  I’m stubborn in that sense, I think most people are.  I can’t work, I have no insurance, I can’t go back to school if I wanted, and I have to be taken five days a week to get chemo which is an hour from home.  My friends and family have been great with their support but I know nothing is ever going to be the same.

I want to thank everyone for the continued support they have shown me. I wouldn’t be here without your help.